Saturday, March 22, 2014

"When you've got a dream like mine
Nobody can put you down
When you've got a dream like mine
Nobody can push you around"
Bruce Cockburn, A Dream Like Mine, 1990

This song's been running through my head all week because,
as it turns out, I've got a dream.
Desire toward a goal. Sight beyond the now.
Finally and amazingly.

Ah, Bruce, my friend,
If only it were true
that dreams somehow disallow the pernicious scrutiny of others.

But I guess that's part of the gig.
We wake up sweating; we were dreaming.
We miss the important information; we were dreaming.
We plan our escape from the norm; we were dreaming.

It's dangerous to dream. Scandalous even.
Who on earth do I think I am making plans of further education in my mid-fifties?
It's not like I have been on a career track that warrants such a move.
And, not only that, but I'll be near sixty when I finish.
Who starts new then?

And what right have I to presume to assign funds to such education
with two young adults in my care?  Young adults who have dreams of their own?

What manner of selfishness does dreaming require?

I like what Jon Acuff said today about fear:

"Being afraid isn’t failure. Staying afraid is...Staying afraid is a choice. 
It’s a lifestyle, a scratchy comforter you pull over your head 
in the hope that it will protect you from worse things." 

Now there's the rub...the worse things.
The things that go bump in the night.
Perhaps there is value in being an "old" dreamer,
for I have faced many lions
and won.
I'll laugh at the days to come!


  1. I love this, Kelli. I love the form, I love the power of it, I love the energy of it. And it captures so much of a universal sense even as it allows us in to see you and your dream, your fear.

    And this part is beautiful:
    Perhaps there is value in being an "old" dreamer,
    for I have faced many lions
    and won.
    I'll laugh at the days to come!

    May you indeed laugh at the days to come, and may you share more of your journey to your dream.

    1. Thanks, Judith. I just figured out how to let the comments post on my blog. It was sweet to find yours. From one writer to another.....just write!

  2. Atta Girl
    !"She is a woman of strength and dignity , she has not fear of old age,when she speaks her words are wise and kindness is the rule for everything she says " Proverbs 31:25-26

  3. Welcome to the blogosphere! I put a link to your blog on mine. :) Will enjoy journeying with you through the Second Half of Life! <3

  4. Thanks for sharing this... echoes a lot of my own thoughts... minor differences -- I'm late 40's with two young adults, one older teenager, and one new grandbaby under my care,,,, But so much of what you shared rings so true in my own heart.....